Of all the ways to get rid of an infection...

I'm guessing if you are trying to get well, hosting a birthday party for 23 children is not the way to do it.  As you may recall, Karissa's birthday party that was originally February 8 was cancelled due to the big ice storm.  This was when it could be rescheduled. I can assure you I felt much better on February 8.

I'm not sure if it is the bronchitis/sinus stuff/gunk, or the spots on my larynx, but talking has gotten much more difficult. It is pretty much just a croak at this point. I brought along my Dynavox, which was a big help, but the white board was the most useful part.  Even with its big speakers, it was no match for the din of Bounce.

Of course there had to be some excitement along the way. A few friends mentioned that they had an extra kid for one reason or another. Fine. Not a problem. Thanks for the heads up.  Then today we hear Karissa telling someone on the phone, "Of course we can drive you." Someone who wasn't actually invited to the party in the first place. Who then shows up with her older sister. Wait, we can't even get that many people in our car. At the same time we (and by we, I mean Kelly) are straightening this out, another mom texts that dad has been in an accident and could we pick up her daughter.  Why yes we could, and is he okay, and...

Schlepping all the stuff out to the car, it doesn't seem like that much.  When you put it in a tiny little room at Bounce with over 20 children and their parents, there isn't room.

Thank heavens for Karina and Nathan who put up decorations and rode herd on the beverages. Thank heavens for Deb who volunteered to take pictures and ended up also helping set up, serve and clean up. Thank heavens for Angie who also helped set up, serve, clean up and wrangle kids.  I don't know what we would have done with out you.  I did manage to serve cake.  That was my super power because getting 30 pieces of cake out of a quarter sheet takes some managing.  Years of preschool birthday parties making a cake stretch came in handy.

Whatever Bounce cost, it was worth it. They play and run wild while someone from Bounce supervises for the better part of an hour and a half.  Karissa got to bungee jump on the trampoline. Then you have thirty minutes for cake and whatever else you can squeeze in and it is over.  Yay!  I wouldn't have made it through anything more tiring, I'm afraid.  I am beat as it is.

There seems to be some force at work that every time I lie down, there has to be a dozen disruptions. The phone rings seven times. Karissa wants to ask me something. The dog is barking. Chaos comes out to play. Not all that restful.

I am getting nervous about starting treatment. I worry with still being so swollen and under the weather. I want to give this all I've got and beat it once and for all.  Right now I don't have a ton to give, unfortunately. I've never been one to be really good at asking for help, but I'm guessing I'm going to have to get better. Anne, Angie, and Eileen brought food this week and it is amazing how just not having that to worry about is so huge. Of course Karissa thinks it is the best thing ever because in her world all the best food comes from somewhere other than our house.

I know there are some of you chomping at the bit to help. I know someone must have the skills to put together a schedule at volunteer spot, or similar. I know you are out there.

I do know that I can't just lie in bed all the time, either. Or in the tub, for that matter. I slept much better after Heather and I walked.  Exercise will help.

Thank you to all of you saying prayers and sending good thoughts, and putting good energy into me.  I'll take all you can spare. It is hard to be too tired to enjoy your kid's birthday party. It is far worse to contemplate not being there for it at all.  I hate to bring up that awful possibility because I don't want it to be a possibility, but reality has to be represented.  I need it to scare me into putting all I can into this.

Oh, and because you asked: while I cannot swallow, I don't have any problem vomiting. Acid reflux, etc. doesn't seem to have any problem working its way up.  Down, down, down would be better.

I guess the best part of having to focus on this new discovery is that I've had to stop thinking about what the future looks like and focus on getting this done. What ever the future holds, it will be there waiting for me on the other side of this oncology adventure.

Until tomorrow...